


feather's shenanigans in hell

by featherclaw99



Category: Shall We Date?: Obey Me!
Genre: Breaking the Fourth Wall, Eventual Smut, I Don't Even Know, Multi, No Plot/Plotless, OR IS THERE, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Polyamory, Swearing, Tags Are Hard, Tags May Change, There is no plot, crackfic, my own MC, playing favourites, pop culture references
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-02
Updated: 2021-03-11
Packaged: 2021-03-14 17:15:28
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 8,351
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29795238
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/featherclaw99/pseuds/featherclaw99
Summary: Don't ask ok?I just really wanted to share my, or rather my MC's experiences with the demon brothers and all that fun stuff.Keep in mind that this is completely and utterly in my mind and mine only, it's not written to please the broad mass of OM players, but maybe there are some people out there who enjoy some quality nonsense.So yeah, this is how I imagine my MC is spending her time in hell, have fun ^^
Relationships: Main Character/Asmodeus (Shall We Date?: Obey Me!), Main Character/Beelzebub (Shall We Date?: Obey Me!), Main Character/Mammon (Shall We Date?: Obey Me!), Main Character/Satan (Shall We Date?: Obey Me!)
Comments: 7
Kudos: 12





	1. Chapter 0 - The Diary

Dear Diary

I usually don't write diaries bc I think they're stupid, but Lucifer "asked me nicely" to write one and when I say he asked nicely I mean he ordered me to and I know he's gonna check tomorrow if I really did write something down so HIIIIIII LUCIFER!!!!!!

But now that I'm already here guess I should introduce myself to whoever might be reading this in the future......besides from you Lucifer.

So....hi, I'm feather, I insist on the lowercase, don't ask me why.  
I was teleported randomly into hell one day to be part of a school exchange despite being 21 and done with school already, but this is still better than not knowing what to do with my life.  
Like college, but with magic. And demons.

And well, at first I was only supposed to stay here for a year, but that year is over and I'm still here, or rather again, because my demons missed me so much!  
And I'd be lying if I said I didn't miss them too.  
Except for you Lucifer.

I live together with the 7 motherfucking archdemons of hell and I have power over all of them, so uh, get on my level.  
And maybe I have a slightly unorthodox view on this whole situation, but that's just me. I'm always unorthodox.  
Fuck you Lucifer.

Welp, I guess that's all I have to say for today.  
Oh and before anyone starts arguing about how I have the audacity to insult precious Lulu so blatantly-

This is my diary.  
If Pridey McPrideface instists on reading my personal thoughts and feelings against my will he has no right to hold them against me because he had no business to read them in the first place.  
You don't write a diary to show it to other people.

K bye

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't worry, this was just the introduction. Sometimes inspiration just hits you at 3am in the night and you have to sit down and write and then you realize it's unfinished so you cut half of it off to be a standalone chapter to finish the rest and post it later ^^
> 
> Feel free to bombard me with Lucifer-Protect-Speech in the comments, I won't change my mind


	2. Always Such a Drama

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Picking up immediately after feather has finished her diary entry, we get to see a little bit of how she interacts with some of her demons. I would've put more of them in, but I ran out of ideas.

Content feather closed the notebook Lucifer had given her and patted it lovingly, placing her pen neatly atop it and looking at it like a fresh flower arrangement.

"That was actually quite fun to do.....maybe I should keep this up.....maybe then I'll stop talking to myself so much."

She leaned back in her chair and stared for a while, then she got up, leaving the notebook right in the middle of her desk like a wedding cake at a bake sale and left her room.  
Finishing this stupid task hadn't taken long so now she was bored and lazily dragged herself into the common room. Maybe someone was home and could entertain her.

"Oi, feather! What did Lucifer tell ya? Satan said he gave you a task?"

So word has already gotten around. feather smiled inwardly that Mammon wasn't trying to not be interested in his human anymore. She climbed over the backrest of the sofa he was sitting on and dropped down crosslegged, then she looked at him blankly.

"Lucifer told me to keep count of all the times you try to lend money from me and report back to him weekly."

A 'snrk' was the only sound Satan made on the other side of the room amd feather shot him a quick glance to stay quiet as Mammon completely lost his shit.

"WHAAAAAT?! Ya can't be serious! I-I don't even ask ya THAT often! What did ya tell'im? C'mon feather ya can't do this to me!"

He had jumped up and was pacing in front of the fireplace, alternating between grabbing at his hair and wildly gesticulating with his hands.

"Of course I can't do that Mammon-"

He immediately was at her side, praising her to heaven and back but she raised a finger.

"I can't do that because it would be way too much work."

Blanking for just a second Mammon jumped up.

"Dammit human! I'm gonna check and if ya wrote down anythin' bad about me I swear I'm gonna get back at ya!"

With those words he stormed out of the common room and feather grinned contently over to Satan, who had put down his book in favour of watching the scene unfold.

"What did Lucifer instruct you to do?"

He asked, firmly but politely. Instead of answering, feather's grin got wider.

"I guess now I'm gonna have to listen to Mammon lecture me about what not to say or even write down about dear big brother."

The look she got back from Satan was one of the things she adored most about him. This certain glint in his eyes whenever the topic was unfavourable for his creator.

"Black roses for your funeral then?"

"The most metal of flowers."

feather nodded knowingly and was rewarded with a light-hearted snicker from him.  
They both absolutely despised Lucifer and were not shy of openly expressing this at any opportunity.

"So he made you write a diary as well? He had me do the same thing, probably hoping I'd be less short-tempered if I write everything down."

His amused chuckle spoke volumes, but feather thoroughly enjoyed her and Satan's hate tirades, too much to end the conversation there.

"And did it help?"

"Ha."

Feigning bravura Satan got up from his seat and waved the book in his hand dismissively.

"I've never been so calm in my life."

"As for me, I think he made me write one so he could check what I'm up to. Ya know, since I refuse to talk to him."

It was always delightful to see Satan laugh, especially out of schadenfreude.

"I admire you, feather. Although I'm not entirely sure if you're incredibly bold or just incredibly stupid."

"Both."

She stretched out her arms and legs, as if she was proudly presenting a new magic trick, and then let herself fall to the side to sprawl over the sofa.  
She closed her eyes and listened to Satan's footsteps leaving the room.

A little less bored. But it could be better. She listened to the eternal fire crackling away and heating the room, pondering on which one of her demons to pester next when she heard a different set of footsteps draw closer. These guys always had the perfect timing...well most of the- sometimes. Sometimes.

She smiled when she recognized whom these footsteps belonged to without opening her eyes and greeted him before he could even say anything.

"Hey Asmo."

She raised her hand above the backrest and lazily waved it in no particular direction.

"Ah- There you are darling, I was looking for you. You simply must come with me and see what I bought at Majolish today! Oh, and I got you something, too. And I know you'll look absolutely stunning in it!"

He had grabbed the hand she was waving with and pulled her upright, eager to take her to his room.  
Fashion show with Asmo? Definetly not boring.  
But just as she got up Mammon came storming into the common room again, a mixture of shock, anger and utter disbelief on his face.

"Do ya have a fuckin' death wish?!"

He yelled as soon as he entered. Asmo's immediate response was to pull feather closer to him as Mammon practically lunged at her.

"Stop yelling, Mammon. What's going on?"

Asmo tried to defuse the situation. A futile attempt, but he didn't know that.

"What's goin' on?! THIS!"

Mammon threw feather's notebook at his brother, who almost didn't catch it in favour of holding his human closer to him. He skimmed over the writing and inhaled sharply.

"feather darling, I know you don't like Lucifer, but do you really have to throw it in his face like that? He'll only get mad at you."

"Oh hey, I have an idea. I should post my diary entries publicly on the internet. That way everyone can read them. OH WAIT."

feather said sarcasticly and stared blankly between her two demons. Asmo sighed and snapped the notebook shut with one hand, the other on his hip.

"Sometimes I can't tell if you're really brave or just-"

"Both. Are we done here?"

"No, we're not! Ya wouldn't even be alive if ya hadn't me! Ya know what I'm gonna have to go through when Luficer's gonna read this?! Ya can't write stuff like that! He'll kill ya!"

Mammon was obviously very distraught about the whole situation, but feather just rolled her eyes and shrugged.

"He won't."

"And what makes ya so sure of that?"

"Simple. I am the most famous person-"

"Ahem."

"Second most famous person in the entire devildom. And I'm important for political reasons. If he killed me that would be treason against Diavolo. He'd never go against Diavolo."

Mammon and Asmo looked at each other. Their human was right, they knew that. But that didn't mean it was ok.

"And Mammon-"

"What?"

"If Lucifer really punishes you for my opinion of him, he'll have another thing coming."

Mammon became red as a tomato at that.

"Oi, oi, it's my job to look after you, not the other way around!"

Suddenly, a sleepy voice sounded from the darkest corner of the room.

"You're way too loud, Mammon."

All three turned to a loney armchair, on which a bundle of blankets started moving and unveiled the Avatar of Sleeping in the weirdest spots in the weirdest positions at the weirdest times.

"Belphie, where you sleeping there this entire time?"

feather asked. She was both astounded and envious of Belphegor's ability to sleep any time. Belphie nodded, not getting up from his makeshift bed.

"Been here since around lunch time. It's nice and quiet and the fire is soothing, and no one is around to yell and wake me up."

He shot a glare at Mammon.

"Sorry 'bout that, but this time it's really-"

Asmo interrupted Mammon before he could go on another one of his rambling rants.

"You know what, feather is right. This is her business only. We shouldn't get involved in it, that includes Lucifer."

He handed the notebook back to feather who immediately held it out to Mammon.

"I am always right. And Mammon, you take this and put it back where you found it. I'm giving Lucifer the chance to respect my privacy. Never say I don't play fair."

Mammon hesitated for a moment before wordlessly taking the notebook from her hand and scurrying off again. Always such a drama with these brothers...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I ran out of ideas, so the next chapter will seamlessly pick up from this one, I just really need to sleep first bc I haven't slept for about 20 hours.
> 
> Also I'm sorry if this is all just a big jumbled mess and badly written, but I'm tired and just don't take this so seriously, it's meant as something fun, why else would I call this *shenanigans*


	3. Heartfelt Moments

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some Asmo time and then some random stuff, yay

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Remember when in the last chapter I said this one would pick up seamlessly? Yeah I lied, tiny time skip
> 
> Also for reasons I tried figuring out the layout of the house of lamentation and actually gave myself a headache and also talked myself into a nervous breakdown but no worries, when my brain is slowly frying itself is the best time to write crack  
> I am not sorry

After Mammon had taken off feather and Asmo left Belphie to his nap and made their way to Asmo's room. The whole way there he did not stop gushing about his newest finds and how breathtaking they'd look together.

"What did I tell you, darling?"

feather was looking at herself in Asmo's full-length mirror, not entirely able to take her eyes off the outfit her demon got her.

"Asmo, I'm gonna say it."

She did another twirl, eyeing the black fabric move and purposefully ignoring where Asmo's eyes went as she did.

"I love that you fully endorse my goth."

She looked down at herself, stretched out her arms in front of her, all to admire an outfit made for her soul. All studs and fishnet and black.

"Weeeell, it's not my style but you're positively radiant in it!"

Asmo beamed and got up to snake his arms around her waist. They started swaying slowly on the spot. feather is a tiny bit taller than Asmo, but that didn't stop him from pulling her closer and whispering into her ear.

"You're so beautiful, feather~ There's just one thing missing."

Out of his line of sight feather grinned and whispered back.

"Is it you on top of me?"

He chuckled.

"Not what I was referring to, but if you're offering I'm not gonna turn you down."

Then he stepped away and grabbed a tiny little bag made of mesh and held close by a little ribbon from inbetween all the other things he's bought, barely the size of his palm, and placed it in hers.

"Just a tiny extra that I just couldn't restist."

"Aww, Asmo you're so sweet!"

feather loosened the ribbon and pulled a delicate little golden chain out of the bag, on which end was dangling a tiny red pentant, sparkling in the light of Asmo's room. And her eyes were sparkling just as much.

"Oh my go-nnnfuck, this is beautiful."

Don't say the g-word down here, that was a close one. Praising their dad who had shunned them and who is the reason they even fell in the first place is maaaaaybe not a good idea.  
feather closely inspected her new treasure, it was a rough red gemstone, barely the size of her fingertip, attached to the chain with a golden setting. Gingerly Asmo took the necklace from her hands and reached around her neck to put it on.

"It's a raw red garnet, matching the one I wear. Because even if you're still a little rough around the edges, you're just as beautiful to me~"

He stepped away a second time, watching the little pentant settle right in the dip between her collarbones.

"Perfect~"

He purred as feather turned to the mirror again and traced the tiny chain. Then she hugged him tightly and kissed him on the cheek.

"Thank you so much Asmo, it's beautiful!"

"Only the best for you, my dear. So. What do you say we're gonna take out that breathtaking new outfit of yours tonight and let everyone see how beautiful we are?"

A mixture of hope and mischief made feather's heart ache a little. Oh how she'd love to go clubbing with Asmo, but alas, no can do, not with her immense fear of large crowds and loud noise.

"I'm so sorry Asmo, I wish I could, but after dinner Levi has already invited me to game all night-"

That wasn't even a lie, just convenient. Of course Asmo started whining.

"But Firday is THE best day to go out partyingggggg"

"Yes, but Friday is also the best day to game all night. I promise you Asmo, one day I will conquer my fears and go out partying with you, but until then, as you know-"

He cut her off, eyes rolling sarcastically.

"Yeah I know, you're just as bad of a hermit as my brother."

feather gave him an apologetic smile and blew him a kiss.

"See you at dinner~"

Then she disappeared out his door.  
Making her way back to her own room because she knew Leviathan would faint at the sight of her in this outfit, although it would be fun to test it. 

"Maybe he'd get a cliche anime nosebleed and then faint. That would be hilarious to watch. But then I'd faint from the blood.....shut up feather stop talking to yourself."

As she walked by the kitchen she heard a commotion from inside and already had a hunch on what had happened. She carelessly yeeted her clothes into her room and kicked open the door to the kitchen.

"NOBODY MOVE!"

Four eyes stared at her in confusion, but at least no one was fighting anymore. The scene in front of feather was honestly surprising even to her. She had expected Beel trying to eat food he wasn't supposed to again, but it was Beel who was holding something out of Mammon's reach instead. Wait...is that...

"Mammon, didn't I tell you to put that back to where you found it?"

feather snapped before either demon could even say anything. Beel quickly handed the notebook back to her.

"Mammon wanted to make copies of it and sell it."

"WHAT? I did NOT! What are ya talkin' about?!"

feather sighed and whacked Mammon on the head with it.

"Ow, hey, quit that!"

"So who haven't you shown this to yet? Shall we go show it to Lucifer together? Hm?"

Her first demon slumped his shoulders.

"I'm sorry, feather."

"You should be!"

"I'm sorry too, I did read what you've written..."

Beel let his head sink, sad eyes staring at the floor and his hands rubbing together insecurely. He made feather's heart melt every time, all she could think was PUPPY MUST PROTECT MUST LOVE PUPPY  
She reached up and patted the redhead.

"It's fine, I could never stay mad at you, Beel."

The smile he gave her made her want to cry. Out of love. Have you ever seen him smile like that? He looks so goshdarn precious omfg how could this guy be a demon and one of the deadly sins?  
See how I evaded the g-word two times there? It's fine if it's only indicated, so long as it's not spoken or spelled out.  
I made these rules shut up.

.....where was I? Oh right-

"Oi! What about me?"

Mammon had his 'Hey-notice-me-but-it's-not-like-I-actually-care-and-stuff' stance and puffed his cheeks, looking anywhere but at feather.  
She whacked him again, not as hard this time.

"You stop snooping around in my room! How would you like it if I did that to you, huh?"

His face turned red.

"Exactly. And I'm a woman, Mammon."

"You don't snoop around a woman's belongings."

Beel chimed in, he had already gotten back to cooking, it was his turn to make dinner tonight.

"I don't want to command you to stay out of my room, Mammon. So......please?"

feather cocked her head at him and clasped her hands together in front of her chest and pouting pleadingly at him.  
Mammon looked at her, scoffed, looked away, waited, looked again, and sighed deeply.

"Maaaaan, ya make it real hard to say no to, feather. Fine, I won't go through your stuff anymore."

"Promise?"

"........Promise."

feather smiled at Mammon and grabbed his hand, pulling him out into the hallway.

"Bye Beel, don't take too many samples, we also want some of thaaaat!"

After she had pulled Mammon into her room and closed the door, she whacked him with the notebook again and then dropped it into his hands.

"Now. Put. It. Back."

"feather, your smile is creepin' me out."

Never losing the bittersweet smile she watched Mammon's every step as he proceeded to place the notebook back on her desk, even place the pen on top of it again, and step back with a sigh. Of relief? Defeat? Who knows, maybe both.  
Without saying a word, feather proceeded to sit down, take the pen into her hand and opened her notebook to a fresh page, and wrote into it as she loudly talked to herself.

"Dear Diary,

Just as I was done writing, Mammon had decided to steal you and show you around the house. He even wanted to make copies of you and sell them. He's such an idiot."

Behind her she heard Mammon grumble, but he wasn't leaving.

"But he's a dork and he's lucky I like him so much, I only whacked him three times."

"On the head!"

"On the head.  
Anyways, that's all for today. Tell Lucifer to go fuck himself."

She had barely finished the last sentence when Mammon pulled her wrist away, causing her to draw a line onto the paper.

"Are ya insane?!"

"As a matter of fact, I am."

"feather, for fuck's sake! Ya can't write stuff like that! If ya push him too far he WILL kill you, human or not."

feather calmly closed her notebook and placed the pen on top, then she got up and looked at her demon. He was obviously scared for her. It hurt her how scared Mammon was of Lucifer. He still hadn't let go of her wrist, so she took his other hand in hers.

"Mammon. Lucifer won't kill me. For a very simple reason. A diary is something private, that nosy demons are not allowed to touch."

Mammon's eyes flitted to their hands in shame.

"So if he does end up reading it and choses to punish me for it, it is my every right to accuse him of breach of privacy, and that will be the only misdeed done, because my thoughts are my own, and not his to control."

Mammon nodded slowly. Again, his human was right. But crossing Lucifer as often as she did....he didn't want to lose her.

"Now, tell me, what do you think? Too daring for dinner?"

With that feather stepped away and spinned around once for Mammon to see her new outfit.  
He stared for a moment and cleared his throat before speaking.

"I gotta say, feather, black suits ya. Goin' out with Asmo tonight then?"

The disappointment was as evident in his tone as the awe for her was in his eyes.  
She smiled as she picked up the clothes she had thrown in here earlier off the ground.

"Nah, Levi asked first."

He couldn't hide his relief from her. Levi was not part of the race, afterall, so he wasn't competition to be wary of.

"Alright, Great Mammon, I'm gonna change now, so be a good demon and turn around."

Without giving Mammon any time to protest she went to her closet and started undressing and Mammon did turn around like a good demon, but not without blushing furously.

"You really are somethin', ya know. Why do ya trust me so much?"

And why did he comply, anyways? She didn't command him, only asked. Nothing was keeping him from turning around...

"Because one: You're not Asmo. And two: You're my first. And three: You don't want to hurt my feelings."

True, all of them. She knew her demons in and out. On multiple levels. I'm making this worse. THIS IS NOT A SEX JOKE

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ran out of ideas for this chapter, but I already have some for the next, hope y'all like it so far ^^
> 
> In his demon form Asmo has a bright red heart, whatever...brooch or what, or is it part of the scorpion, well anyways, it's also a gemstone, and the red garnet does stand for passion and a heightened libido, so honestly what else could it be?
> 
> Oh and the race I mentioned refers to solely my preferences. I know there are a lot of Levi stans out there, but I'm simply not one of them. By now I think it's become a bit clearer how I/my MC stands to each of the brothers, but do not fret, each of them will get their turn!


	4. The Loudest Dogs Don't Bite

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A quick fuck before dinner? Nonono, too early in the story, sorry Mammon~  
> And yay, some feather vs. Lucifer!  
> Who was waiting for this? I definetly was!

feather had just taken off the fishnet tights and was only in her underwear when Mammon embraced her from behind, nuzzling into the crook of her neck.

"Yo Mammon what-"

"Eyes closed babe."

He actually had his eyes closed. Sneaky demon. Yet she relished in his warmth for a moment. Her demon was so insecure with the others around, so when they were alone she cut him some slack.  
And he deserved all the love.

So she was just standing in front of her closet, figuring out what to wear for dinner and later for gaming with Levi while Mammon held her close, his eyes still closed.  
He is such a good demon.  
And it's not like she particularly cared. If she had to pick a sin that described her the best she'd choose lust with wrath as a close second.

"So...are you gonna let me get dressed or will you be my shirt tonight?"

feather waited for Mammon to move so she could put on the tshirt she had picked out, but he didn't.

"What's the rush? It's still a while til dinner."

"Wow, even Asmo wasn't this needy earlier."

"Shaddup."

He showed no intention to move in the near future, so for now feather just gave up and let herself be a body pillow, even though they were still standing. After all, her demon cared deeply for her, though he'd never admit it, and today she has tested his nerves more than enough. She leaned into him and sighed.

"I'm sorry for hitting you, Mammon."

"Nah, it's fine, I deserved it."

His voice was hushed now and his breath tickled her bare skin.

_Calm yourself feather. Beel is in the next room, he'll hear you._

She thought to herself, but Mammon cared a lot less. He was slowly pulling her backwards toward her bed, fully intending on taking this all the way. When his calves hit the bedframe he carefully sat down, pulling her onto his lap and holding her there.

"Mammon...I don't really wanna be covered in sex at dinner...."

feather made a poor attempt at trying to get her demon to stop, she wasn't even sure if he was listeing to her as he started tracing kisses down her neck and shoulder.  
I mean, good for Mammon to finally be able to come out of his shell after such a long time, but right now was just not a good time.  
She was more or less stuck in a Mammon safety seat. If there is something the Avatar of Greed wants very little will stop him from getting it.

Like for example a phone suddenly going off.  
Both of them flinched at the sudden noise coming from somewhere on the other side of the room and feather took that opening to jump out of Mammon's reach.  
When the sound played again feather found her D.D.D. buried under some paperwork.

"I was wondering where I had lost this."

Before anything else, feather finally pulled the tshirt over her head and then checked who had this impeccable timing.

"A message from Solomon."

She said to herself.

> monSOLO: Hey feather.  
>  Would you be up for helping me with an experiment after school next week?  
> feather: yeah totally  
> monSOLO: Great! I'll explain it to you then.

She set the D.D.D. down and looked at Mammon. He looked like she just dumped him and left him standing in the rain, even though they were in her room. She sighed and, now dressed a little more appropriately, walked over to him and pulled his head to her chest.

"Mammonnnnnnnn don't be sulky. You know I love you."

He didn't say anything. That must've been a pretty big hit to his ego.  
She sighed again and started petting his white hair.

"Fluffy."

"I'm not fluffy."

"Yes you are."

Now some motion found its way back into him as he jumped up right into her grill, their noses touching.

"Don't call me that, human."

He's so cute when he's frustrated. I am so mean...  
feather sneaked a quick kiss from him, I mean, if he's that close...and then grinned as her big bad demon staggered and turned red again.

"The loudest dogs don't bite."

She said as she now finally put on some pants. Mammon was too preoccupied with what had just happened to even register let alone be offended by that.  
Now finally dressed feather clapped her hands.

"Alrighty....what now?"

The look Mammon gave her made her laugh. She could hear him say "Really now?" without him actually saying it.

"I'm sorry Mammon, but now is really not the time. We can try again when there isn't any impending family gathering or anything else of the sort, kay?"

Mammon got up and shrugged.

"Guess you're right. It's almost time now anyways."

She smiled at him. He should know she would never reject him without a good reason, and a family dinner was a good reason. You don't fuck right before a family dinner, especially not if Asmo is part of it, bc if anyone will notice for sure it's him and he'll never shut up about it. And the majority of her demons are almost a litte too perceptive so yeah, no thanks.

She grabbed his hand again and they walked out of her room onto the hallway. The sounds coming from the kitchen told them that Beel was still in there, but looking at the time he should be almost done.

"Wanna go set the table?"

"Uggghhhhh but that's so much woooork!"

"Come on."

And would you belive it, despite complaining the entire time Mammon actually helped set the table and just as they were done the twins came from the kitchen, Beel carrying an honestly huge pot even compared to him, Belphie carrying a considerably smaller pot. (Help guys where have I read that Beel likes chili was it another fanfic or is it mentioned in the game somewhere please help)

"Who let Beel alone in the kitchen? When I came in he was about to eat that entire pot by himself."

Belphie stated after they had set down the food on the table. There was no accusation in his voice, but there never really was much emotion in anything he said ever, so that didn't really mean much.  
feather and Mammon looked at each other. Yeah, admittedly that was not just a little stupid of them.

"I pulled Mammon out of the kitchen."

feather confessed, conveniently leaving out the reason why. No one else had to be pulled into this whole diary mess. Belphie just nodded and sat down, dropping his head onto the table. Out of comission until dinner would start.  
Now it was Beel's turn to have her attention.

"feather, that small pot is for you, because you can't eat as spicy as we do."

Yeah...that was not fun when they discovered that 'human spicy' and 'devildom spicy' were literally worlds apart.

"Oh my g-nnnnnnnn Beel that's so fucking cute of you!"

It's really astonishing how deeply that word is edged into our day-to-day language. Honestly, try it yourself.  
feather hugged her big demon tightly, his smile gave her life.

A short time later they were all seated and started eating, but it didn't take long for Lucifer to pick up the dreaded topic.

"So feather, have you done what I asked you to?"

Three out of seven demons looked at each other with shock, a fourth one hid his grin behind his cup of tea. And before feather could finish chewing to answer her demons did so for her.

"Ah, Lucifer, ya really don't wanna read it."

"Yeah, I mean, it's not really our place anyways..."

"She definetly did, though."

Belphie and Levi looked between their brothers confused. They had definetly missed the main topic of the day today.  
Lucifer closed his eyes and sighed. That was Lucifer-an for 'I am so done with this'.

"Quiet."

He said calmly but firmly and his brothers shut up. Now finally able to speak feather smiled at him.

"As you can see, Lucifer, I have multiple witnesses who can vouch for me that I have indeed done what you told me to."

"So it seems."

He scanned the table, seeing the worried looks of Asmo, Mammon and Beel, and the amusement Satan was not holding in while pretending not to listen.

"And you don't want me to know what she's written because...?"

That question was aimed at his brothers, but feather was faster this time.

"Because frankly it's none of your damn business."

All of them minus the members of the Anti-Lucifer League cringed at that. Their human had absolutely no filter when talking to him, as if she didn't know how dangerous that could be. But just one look at her smug grin prooved the opposite. Their human knew full well how to make Lucifer furious while staying just out of his reach, which only made him even more furious.  
Before anything else could happen Mammon chimed in.

"Aaaah, Lucifer, she didn't mean it like that-"

"Shut up Mammon, I did."

Dammit stupid human!

"feather, darling, what did I tell you earlier about just _throwing it in his face like that_?"

Asmo only whispered the last part across the table, feather knew what he was hinting at anyways, but she shook her head.

"If you want to read it, I'm not stopping you. But let it be known that you asked me to write A DIARY. Maybe there has been some miscommunication on your part-"

Ouch

"but in the human world a diary is something private that no one is ever supposed to read. So if you do, be prepared for no filter whatsoever. And if you wanted me to write something for you to read, ask for a report like you already do from everyone else next time."

With that, the topic was over for her, clarified by her shoving a spoonful of chili into her mouth and staring straight ahead, ignoring the entire table having fallen quiet around her. It was on Lucifer to resolve the tension now.

"Very well, I'll take everyone's word and trust that you will keep this up."

She shrugged and a breath of relief made its round.

The rule was simple enough.  
feather opposed any kind of oppression instinctively, she was maybe even worse than Satan in that department. So for her to get along with Lucifer meant he had to refrain from any dictations aimed at her. Any rebuke would fall on deaf ears. The wall she has built around her was specifically Lucifer-proof and it had taken him a long time to find a way to get through to her.  
Who would have thought a puny little human would have so much control over the Avatar of Pride, without even having a pact with him.

Now that that was out of the air feather focused on Levi until he noticed her staring.

"I practised after our last match. You're so gonna go down."

Levi grinned at her, thankful for having ended the awkward silence, that was a thing they both hated.

"Oh you're ON, normie. You really think you can beat me?"

"Any time."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Does anyone remember what D.D.D. stands for? Was that ever explained? bc I couldn't find any info on it on the wiki and I really wanna know what it stands for
> 
> oh btw this is written from the point in the story that I'm currently stuck at, which is lesson 33, and all the devilgram stories I've read so far are canon, which is important, also I always interpret suggestive blackscreens as they definetly fucked.  
> So this race I refered to in the last chapter, it's really more of a scoreboard, counts how many times each of them have...scored with my MC canonically (or at least what my mind interpreted as such)
> 
> The scores currently are:  
> 1\. Satan with three (3!) times (his birthday event, lesson 29-12, lesson 29-19)  
> 2\. Mammon with two (2!) times (lesson 29-13, Staying Home Together)  
> 3\. Asmo with one (1!) time (Catch the Lost Bunnies!)
> 
> No one else has entered yet  
> can you believe it? Solmare is holding Asmo back so much that SATAN is in first place. SATAN!!!  
> oh btw these scores only count bc I chose the options leading to suggestive blackscreens first try. bc I know there is a possibility to fuck Lucifer in lesson 20 but I hate Lucifer so why should I do that?
> 
> I know that the story forces yout to make a pact with Lucifer, but that's not how pacts work. So no, my MC does not have a pact  
> with Lucifer, at least not in the way she has one with everyone else
> 
> Also I have absolutely no clue how many words this is. It feels like more than the previous chapters, but the program I'm writing this on is literally just the Editor, ya know, hell.txt (that's literally the name of my file I'm not joking) and when I copy and paste the story into AO3 the word counter doesn't update, just stays at 500000 characters left, which is mighty helpful. Not.  
> Petition to show the word count for each chapter individually instead of for the whole work? Anyone? Just me? I'll shut up


	5. Hot'n'Cold

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Epic game night with Levi alriiiiight
> 
> And taking breaks is important

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yo I just realized you can put up to 255 characters as the chapter title, has anyone ever needed that many characters? What the heckity-heck?  
> Ah, maybe Leviathan's animes.....  
> Oh sorry, enjoy the chapter ^^

Levi and feather were perched in front of Levi's PC, both very passionately smashing buttons to beat each other up faster and better than the other.

"I see you've learned quite a bit since the last time, human, but I won't lose! Leviathan PUUUUUUUUNCH!!!!"

Leviathan's character unleashed their ultimate attack, unblockable for anyone less than an absolute pro. And as feather said, she had been practicing.  
With undeniable precision she deflected his attack, leaving him stunned and open to execute her own, sending him flying and a deep voice declared her victory.

"BOOM! And that's how it's DONE Leviathan!"

feather jumped from her chair and did a little victory fist pump while Leviathan deflated down into his chair. How could he have possibly lost to the normie?  
feather grinned victoriously at him.

"Ayyyy c'mon Levi~ Don't be sad now. It was a good game."

She sat back down and offered him a high five, she knew he wouldn't leave her hanging. And he didn't.  
Reluctantly he clapped her hand, seemingly recharging his self-confidence.

"Yes, it was. I have to admit feather, you have bested me. I guess I can't keep calling you a normie anymore."

She beamed at him and it was already too much for him to handle.

" _Now the padawan has become the master_ "

feather whispered meaningfully, earning a laugh from Levi despite him blushing furiously.  
And still blushing he closed down the game and pulled up the last anime they were watching together. (Don't make me make up an anime name I'm shit at coming up with names just insert your fav anime here idc)  
It's become pretty late, but otakus live on energy drinks and overexaggerated chips eating, they didn't even bat an eye at the time.

* * *

  
An increasingly louder becoming knocking shook feather awake. When did she even fall asleep? Wait- what time is it? Looking over at Levi he was grudgingly stretching out his limbs. They both must have fallen asleep at his PC.

"OI! LEVI! ARE YA IN THERE?!"

Mammon's voice sounded from beyond the door, and the way it sounded made Levi jump to his feet.  
He shuffled more or less hurriedly to the door and opened it just a crack, enough for Mammon to barge in uninvited.

"Ya got some nerve, makin' me come all the way here!"

He crossed his arms and tapped his foot irritatedly, but Levi just stared at him, blinking a few times to force the last bit of sleep out of his system.

"Stop yelling, Mammon. Why are you even here so early anyways?"

The way Mammon looked at him made both Levi and feather perk up uncomfortably.

"Early?! It's past noon! Don't tell me ya didn't pick up your phone because ya were sleepin'!"

Sensing an impending fight, and an unneccessary one at that, feather now got up as well to go inbetween the two brothers.

"Calm down, please, both of you. Why are you here Mammon?"

"Lucifer called for a meetin'. No humans allowed."

He didn't look at her, as if he had completely ignored her question, even though he answered it. Was he....jealous?  
Without saying anything else Mammon grabbed his brother by the arm and pulled him out of the room. feather was left standing there alone.

"What has gotten into him all of a sudden...?"

Sometimes Mammon was a bigger mystery to her than the existence of the universe. At least the universe didn't kiss her and then the next day pretend like she was non-existent. No, the universe only pretended like she didn't exist.  
Pondering on what to do now that she was apparently alone in the big house she chose that now was the perfect time for a long shower. With her attention-hungry demons around she never really got a moment to herself and admittedly, that could become very draining.

Walking down to her room she checked her phone. Two missed calls from Mammon, she didn't have to guess what that was about, and quite a few missed messages from Asmo. Probably updates on his party night. feather ignored the messages for now, she didn't want to waste any of the time she had, Asmo could tell her all about last night himself later.

As she got ready for the shower she thought about her problem child Mammon again.  
Was he actually jealous that she spent the night in Levi's room? Maybe he thought she'd rather be with Levi than with him? But he knows that's not true. Or was it because she rejected him before dinner? But he said he understood that.  
His behaviour just didn't make any sense.

"Katy Perry was right...who would've thought that a bop from 2008 would still be true in literal hell......great now it's stuck in my head."

* * *

Angrily humming Hot'n'Cold, though by now it's become more like a playful annoyance, feather came out of the shower. Being alone for a while after so much sensory overload this entire week was a blessing. Maybe she should bring up human-recharging days with her demons so that she won't accidentally snap at them. Because she really didn't want to, but after a certain amount of time it was no longer in her control.  
Maybe she should also talk to them about.....that other problem....

A polite knock pulled her out of her thoughts.

"Uh, one sec I'm kinda naked right now..."

She hurried over to her closet and grabbed the first best piece of clothing to cover herself with, struggling to get the fabric over her still clammy skin. At this point she regretted having taken a shower. Anxiety-induced dressing up when someone was waiting at the door has got to be one of the most horrible things in the world. (been there, done that, not very pleasant I tell ya)

After she finally managed to get herself dressed to a point of being comfortable having others around feather opened her door to see Satan smiling at her.

"Oh hey Satan, sorry for making you wait. Honestly, had it been any other one of you..."

He laughed as he closed the door behind him.

"Don't worry, I'm not as desperate as my brothers. Not yet."

"Ha. So is the no-human-allowed meeting over?"

He chuckled and nodded.

"Yes it is, that's what I was here for to tell you. Were you alright here on your own?"

His concern was cute. He could be so compassionate when his brothers weren't around. When it was just her.

"Yes, the time alone was really welcome to be honest. I can't really get a break from your brothers otherwise."

She sat down on her bed and patted the spot next to her, and Satan happily obliged.

"I completely understand. I often wish they'd disappear myself."

"Satan, be nice."

He chuckled again. feather loved that sound.  
She leaned against his shoulder and sighed. Each one of them on their own wasn't the problem. It was when the brother's interests and her own were in conflict that made her hurt inside. She didn't want any of them to feel neglected, but with only one of her and seven....well....six of them, it just couldn't be helped. There was no fair solution and it made her soul clench in pain.  
Satan draped his arm over her shoulders. He has also come a long way from his initial standing point concerning the human.

"You seem like there's something on your mind, feather. Care to share it with me?"

There were way too many things on her mind. She knew she could trust any and all of them, yes, even Lucifer, with any of her problems, but trust didn't come easily, even after all this time with them. Not that kind of trust.  
Instead of answering she shrugged.

"I dunno, maybe I'm just a little out of it, it happens."

Of course Satan knew she was lying. She wasn't trying very hard, counting on Satan to pick up on it.  
He remained quiet.

"But you know what always helps me feel better? Music."

She got up and pulled Satan up with her.

"Where are we going?"

"Your room. I have a feeling we will be bothered a lot less there than if we stay here."

"Probably true."

Her hair still damp she went to Satan's room with him following close behind. He had let go of her hand the moment they entered the hallway, his signs of affection were for his human's eyes only.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Name all the references in this chapter and win a gold star!
> 
> Also let's just pretend that Lucifer was smart/generous enough to give the only female in the house her own bathroom, like an en-suite, bc in the canon there are only two bathrooms in the entirety of the house, one being Asmo's personal bathroom, the other one being shared, and I as a years-long Sims player know that one bathroom for 6 people, let alone 6 guys and one girl (bc my MC is a girl, maybe it's no prob for your MC) is just not gonna work. Although it kinda raises the question why magical beings even need a bathroom in the first place, but let's not think about that ^^
> 
> Oh also there are two timeskips in this chapter, I tried making that clear by the horizontal line and also the space I left, in case anyone was confused by that. I really don't want to write "timeskip". We're not on Wattpad here. We're grown-ups goddamnit!


	6. Dissolve and Coagulate

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just listening to music with Satan today, all chill  
> a.k.a. Satan realizing that his human is a lot less ok than they make everyone believe they are

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry if this one is a little shorter (I honestly can't tell but it feels shorter) but I've been busy making a birthday drawing for the twins!!!! It's Beel's and Belphie's birthday today!!!!!!  
> Happy Birthday to my two babies >w<
> 
> Anyone who'd like to see it, I'm gonna post it later today on my instagram @skelmirsdottir  
> Oh, I also posted myself singing Beel's song Hungry Six-Pack on there if anyone would like to listen to a German making japanese-sounding sounds to a melody ^^  
> And it's where I post my art in general and maybe some other random stuff
> 
> Sorry for the self-advert, enjoy the chapter!

"Alright Satan, where are your speakers because I know you have some."

feather had already gotten out her D.D.D., searching for her playlist.  
Satan closed the door to his room and turned the lock. No impeding brothers that way.

"Speakers? What makes you think I have speakers?"

He asked confused, but feather gave him an amused smile.

"Oh come on. Playing dark and angry songs on full volume so no one can talk to you while still telling them how you feel after a fight? I still do that. And so do you."

A single huff escaped him and he snapped his fingers, immediately sending a few dozen books flying from one corner of the room to another and revealing a considerably big stereo. feather gasped with joy. She should ask for a stereo in her room.  
She turned it on and connected her device.

"And what do you intent to do now, feather?"

A melody started playing and feather quickly made her way back over to him.

"Satan, have you ever just.... _listened_ to music? Actively? Oh my fuck this riff..."

Her eyes fluttered closed and she started swaying softly as a guitar started playing.

"Huh....I can't say I really have-"

"Shhhhhh. Listen."

She pushed him back to sit on his bed, then let herself fall down next to him. Splayed out on Satan's bed like a starfish, with her eyes closed, she listened intently to the song she'd picked out.

> _You are the one_  
>  _Tore off both your arms_

Of course he recognized the singer immediately, but he felt like saying anything would only anger feather now, so instead he stayed quiet and watched his human.

> _Gouged out your eyes_  
>  _And ripped out your own tongue_  
>  _So listen_

One could think she was simply asleep, were it not for one single finger tapping along to the beat. She seemed completely absorbed into the music.

> _I'm not special, I'm just broken_  
>  _And I don't wanna be fixed_

Satan perked up at those lyrics.  
_No one can talk to you while still telling them how you feel_  
Those were her words...  
As the music picked up so did her movements, somehow her entire body was moving, despite still laying flat on her back.

> _No one else I_  
>  _No one else I_  
>  _Wanna be like_  
>  _So I stayed the same_  
>  _Like nobody else_

Something started dawning to Satan. He used the short interlude to lay down next to her.

> _So you think you can sing or clap_

The motion feather made was barely visible, but the message she sent through their pact was almost a little too passionate, a powerful surge of energy that Satan wasn't used to from her.  
_Listen. Feel. **See.**_

> _Well, all you need is an ear_  
>  _So listen_

Properly confused by what she meant by that Satan directed the energy into the room.

> _I'm not special, I'm just broken_  
>  _And I don't wanna be fixed_

At first nothing happened, maybe it was an accident on her part, having gotten too passionate about the music to the point of unconciously casting spells, he heard of that happening before.  
But then something did happen.  
Originating from his stereo, blue-ish green-ish sheet music floated through his room, swaying softly with the rhythm, just like she had done before.

> _No one else I_  
>  _No one else I_  
>  _Wanna be like_  
>  _So I stayed the same_  
>  _Like nobody else_

It was nowhere near the actual sheet music of the song, but still it was beautiful to look at. When the notes finally made their way to the bed a light breeze came with them, barely noticable, but soothing. An inexplainable feeling of comfort and security washed over him.

"... _Feel_..."

Satan whispered to himself. Was this how feather saw music?

> _No one else I_  
>  _No one else I_  
>  _Wanna be like_  
>  _So I stayed the same_  
>  _Like nobody else_

The chorus repeated and then the guitar came in again, at that moment feather got up, a heartbrakingly sad smile on her face, and she swayed through the music, playing with it like smoke in the air. Her eyes were fixed downward, still deeply indulged in the song.  
When the chorus repeated yet again Satan finally saw it.  
The way feather's soul shone in harmony with the magic around her. She directed the sheet music straight through her own body and drawing swirly patterns through the entire room.  
He had cast the spell to make the music visible, but it was her own doing to manipulate it like this, and she did so without any spell cast, just with the power she already held in her. He could tell just how special music was to her.

> _I'm not special, I'm just broken_  
>  _And I don't wanna be fixed_

Those lines were repeated like a mantra and feather started whispering along. She let the notes dance over her hands and around her body as they retracted back into the stereo, and when the last few dissipated into thin air and the room fell quiet.  
It felt like an eternity before the next song started playing, but no mind was paid to that one as feather sat back down next to Satan, bracing herself for the talk she's been fearing ever since she came back to hell.

"Who taught you to do that?"

Was his first question. feather shrugged and smiled at him.

"No one, I was always able to do that. Just now was the first time I actually saw what I was doing."

"Meaning...?"

" _Meaning_ that I don't simply listen to music. I _feel_ it. And with my eyes closed I can see it. Thanks to you I could finally see it for real just now."

She wrapped her arms around him.  
Satan has heard of this phenomenon before. Synesthesia, a really fascinating topic, even more so now that his human apparently had a form of it.

"So you can see music and only tell me about this now?"

He feigned hurt and she chuckled at that.

"Well, I can't see ALL music, I have to have a special, deep connection to the song, then I can see what you just saw."

"That leads me to the next question. feather-"

He moved away from her embrace and looked intently into her eyes.

"What were you trying to tell me?"

feather shifted uncomfortably. It was much easier for her to communicate with songs than through words. Always has been.  
Satan picked up on it and changed his stance.

"Alright, I'll tell you what I've gathered, and you nod if I got it right."

She nodded.

"You said to me that you play music to tell others how you feel."

_*nods*_

"And just now you told me you can only see music if you feel connected to it."

_*nods*_

"Based on that, you clearly had the intention to show me this talent, as you made sure to pick a song you feel strongly about to make sure it would work."

_*hesitated nod*_

"A song you feel so strongly connected to means you can poject it onto yourself."

_*very slow nod*_

"feather, you are not broken."

"Yes I am."

His attempt at consoling her was immediately shot down. She let her head sink and sent another message through their bond, this one barely a whisper compared to the flood of passion before.

_Hurt. Insecure._

"And music helps you cope with that."

She nodded again.

"It manages to say what I can't."

Her voice was strained, this took a lot of effort for her. Satan nodded understandingly, now it was his time to embrace her.

"Thank you for sharing this with me, even if it's hard to."

feather hid her face in Satan's jacket. Her social interaction fuel tank was empty.

"So, shall we continue listening to your music? Just listen?"

The way feather sighed into his shoulder was answer enough. But although he was glad his human trusted him enough to share this with him, she obviously had other problems buried deep that she wasn't ready to unearth.  
He'd have to be careful not to hurt her by trying to help.

He layed back down with her in his arms as music continued to fill the room, but he was lost in thought.  
How does one go about helping someone who doesn't want help? Do you let them be? Do you just stand aside and watch as they destroy themselves?  
He couldn't do that, out of the question.  
But talking to her would have no effect, the way she instantly retorted him was proof.  
She was thouroughly convinced that she was broken.  
He'd have to find out why that was.

And if he liked it or not, he'd need the help of his brothers for that.

When he looked at her she was fast asleep, this time for real.  
He smiled gently and whispered into her no longer damp hair.

"We'll go slowly, one step at a time. Your pace."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bonus points for anyone who can tell me which song feather played :D
> 
> Ooooh first time feather used magic in this story. Exciting!  
> Anyone else who has such a close connection to music? Anyone else who can see it? I've never even heard of synesthesia being a thing before I told a friend how I can see and feel music and she told me what that was. It's really interesting how weird the human brain is...
> 
> Poor broken feather  
> Now I can say it, ever since I started playing I realized that the MC we're given is basically just a white canvas the brothers use to express themselves with. But what if instead the MC was just as broken as they are?  
> I've been wondering how they would react to someone in dire need of help, (really hate to say this) someone like me, and I'm sure there are many others out there who have not as easy of a life as the MC.
> 
> But again, this is my personal experience, I'm not generalizing, this is solely from a subjective point of view


End file.
